Had kbbq with mellllll & linda last night. Good chat. We’re so different! haha.
L: 20, smallest, innocent.
M: 29, oldest, minimalist, passionate.
C: 25, middle, curious, & lazy. hahahaha
Was so exhausted today..crappy day at YVR.
Honestly debating… should i keep this job or not? Not quite ready to let go just yet…but so many signs to let go.
1. right when i got the job, so many disapproval: mom, hannah, gloria, abi.
2. mom’s continuous dislike for this job.
4. even though i like my crew…it’s a gossip fest. & not everyone has the same work ethic. but that’s anywhere!
& i hate the hierarchy world. Our pay is not too off from one another, but i dislike the fact that there is this invisible seniority type of respect we need to give to those whose position is higher than ours. ex. SA, KH, Sups, managers.
What would it look at a health care setting. student nurse, new nurse, senior nurse, specialty nurses, docs. How do I handle that?
At least as of now, I see these people as my teachers, those who are suppose to give me guidance but at the same time, my teammates. However, I could also see how it can turn into this messy hierarchy event as well in a hospital. Need to work on humbling myself.
(may i simply blame it on my period for all these emotions? perhaps i would.)
5. takes up my time. With work in “the way”, I am more limited in what I can do with my life. In addition to the slight obligation to help out with our family business, plus this job, i am quite limited with reviewing for this upcoming semester PLUS all the distracting things that I am already doing: drama, movies, hang out, sleep (i sleep a lot!!), follow winner, variety shows, etc…
6. Feeling of helplessness of how unfair this society is. Some could afford 15,000 dollar bags, even lower ones such as 75$ bags. Yet, that can be some people’s meal cost for the entire week or even month/s! This frustrates me. & I am contributing to this system by persuading others to participate in it. Going back to the horrible cycle of: rich gets richer, middle and lower class remains or even goes lower and feeds the rich and their little rich ones who grows up thinking that this is the norm.
segway: this goes to the topic Mary and I had. What if the person had only known this lifestyle for the entire life. are they really in the wrong? Even after they are aware of this situation that their perspective of the world is not the same for everyone else, and if they continue to live the “luxury” lifestyle, are they wrong?
imo, i believe that if you are aware…we need to do something. but…the question is, what do we do to be a real change?
I’ve recent been listening to a 3 part pod cast that talks about the topic, white saviour syndrome. It resolves around the topic that “poor countries” such as Africa, Asia, Southeast Asia do not need someone to save them. That they (the whites) need to acknowledge that they have actually been the problem and have not actually been helping with the much needed progress for the country that these organization claims to be saving/helping. What seems to be ways to solve this problem is:
1. acknowledge that such a problem occurs
2. don’t be a part of the problem.
i) don’t participate in such mission (ex. create a water well for the summer)
ii) don’t be silent about the problem
iii) support the local people instead of supporting organization that works simply as a 3rd party
3. ask yourself why you are going on such a mission
4. ask yourself, are you doing what you want to do on that mission at your own local settings? are you supporting your own community?
5. create a platform for others to speak. shut up when you need to. listen when spoken to.
tired of blogging. peace out for now.